To protect my mother’s precious image of my youth, I will omit the details of my years in junior high, but let’s just say I was no angel. By the time it came around to my Freshman year in high school I had decided to start a new and leave behind the Boys (Goal #1), Booze (Goal #2) and Bad Decisions (Goal #3)…I would ultimately achieve this until, of course, the temptation of My Senior Year.

(Side Note: One thing you may or may not know about me…When I’m determined to do something, there’s very little to get in my way. I wouldn’t say I set unrealistic goals, so perhaps that’s why they’re more often that not achieved. In 2009, for example, every item on my “Wish List” was obtained. Well, everything with the exception of opening my own bar. I’m still working on that.)

So over the first couple of years I spent the majority of time with a group of Mormon girlfriends. I’m not kidding when I say the temptation of Boys, Booze and Bad Decisions were absolutely NON-existent. I was once not allowed to enter my girlfriend’s house while wearing a tank top, for fear I would tempt the boys to think bad thoughts. True story.

Despite their ridiculous rules, these first couple years of high school contain some of my most favorite memories. It’s amazing how fun it can be to dress in costume, sleep on trampolines, conduct late night dance parties and eat at Red Robin (aka my first employer)…

Around my junior year, however, my Mormon girlfriends seemed to be more interested in finding a husbands than anything else…Since I was still determined to avoid such shenanigans, I became obscenely involved in student organizations. My friends referred to me as “Suzy Highschool” and a “Walking Hall Pass.” I was in everything from ASB to Honors Societies to Key Club to Senior Women to GLBT Club to Student Orientation Leaders to Yearbook and more. I, along with my friend Caitlyn, even started our own club to celebrate boobs called “Pink Ladies.” (FACT: To this day Pink Ladies remains the largest student organization at both the old and new Folsom high school campuses.)

Before I knew it, it was the summer before my senior year and the temptation to break Goal #1 (Booze) had finally overcome me. My first experience was at Caitlyn’s house, where I got shnockered off  Mike’s Hard Lemonade. While intoxicated I became paranoid the police were coming and I ended up hiding in a closet for two hours with my now best friend Blaire. Despite my drunken freak out, the next morning I realized from there out, I would welcome booze into my life with open arms.

Once Senior year officially began I had already given up on Goal #1 (Booze), but it dawned on me…it had been 1200+ days since I had kissed a Boy (Goal #2) and I hadn’t, for the most part, made any Bad Decisions (Goal #3). I incidentally shared the fact that it was forever since I had a man in my life and it became an obsession for my friends to find me one.

In yearbook class a countdown was posted on the board that lived the duration of the school year. It’s hard to see in this photo, but in our 2002 HS yearbook I am referred to as “Denise 1,339 Days Bertuccelli” under the editor’s notes.

By the time Senior Ball came around in June, I had still unsuccessfully met and/or kissed a boy…That is until Jeff (I’m pretty sure that’s his name). Jeff was a junior at another local highschool and was my friend Michelle’s date to the dance. I wouldn’t say we hit it off…we hung out over the course of the night, had a good time, but said goodbye assuming we’d never see each another again.

The Saturday before graduation marked close to 1400 days. I was headed out to a beach bonfire with my girlfriends, when my friend Michelle informed me Jeff was going to meet up with us. The bonfire was on the lake, right near the prison and required a short hike to the small beach hidden from the road. After a chugging contest with my friend Meghan, I opened my eyes to see Jeff walking towards the crowd. The details here become a bit hazy (I blame the smoke from the fire), but at some point this photo was taken:

My streak had ended, and so did Goal #2 (No Boys). But what about Goal #3 (Bad Decisions)? Well shortly after my makeout session, a helicopter came flying overhead. Turns out there was an escaped prisoner and they were searching the areas surrounding the lake. Where our group had set up the bonfire happened to be an illegal location. Before I knew it about 6 El Dorado County Police Department SUVs rolled up and I was handcuffed to this guy Ben. We were cited with misdemeanors and had to appear in court over the summer before college. There went Goal #3 (Bad Decisions).

**For the record this was the only time I have been in trouble with the law. Thank gawd.