Fall Festival Season aka San Francisco’s Summer

By now you have probably figured out that if it involves booze, music, a theme, etc, that I most likely want to be a part of it. As July is quickly coming to a close, I thought it important to highlight the Festivals of the Fall. Let’s face it, Summer might as well be winter in San Francisco with all this fog we’ve had, so let’s make August, September & October the key staycation months of 2010!

Below you will find a complete list (well complete in that these are the things I would like to attend) of Fall Festivals!

Only in San Francisco: A great site for all your San Francisco good times!

August

Saturday, August 7
Ferris Bueller’s Day Off is Playing at Dolores Park

Saturday, August 14 & Sunday, August 15
Outside Lands Music & Arts Festival

September

Friday, September 3 – Monday, September 6
Sausalito Art & Wine Festival

Saturday, September 11 & Sunday, September 12
Ghiradelli Square Chocolate Festival7th Annual Brews on the Bay

Saturday, September 18
2nd Annual Taste of Fillmore Street

Saturday, September 25 & Sunday, September 26
SF International Dragon Boat Festival & Polk Street Blues Festival

Sunday, September 26
Folsom Street Faire

October

Sunday, October 3
Castro Street Fair

Friday, October 8 – Tuesday, October 12
Fleet Week

Saturday, October 16 & Sunday, October 17
Half Moon Bay’s Pumpkin Festival & Treasure Island Music Festival

Saturday, October 23 – Tuesday, October 26
Oktoberfest by the Bay

Have You Been Iced?

If you haven’t heard about this yet, you’ve either been living under a rock or in Folsom (no offense). Bros Icing Bros is a new drinking game started on college campuses across the country. Much like the game of Buffalo, amongst a group of family and/or friends this game is initiated once, and you play for life unless disqualified (See Rule #1).

The objective is to creatively conceal a Smirnoff Ice from one of your opponents. When they discover this hidden delight, they have been “ICED” and must get down on one knee and chug the delicious beverage until the very last drop.

Rule #1: You cannot refuse an ice. If you refuse to drink the ice you are instantly excommunicated and shunned, and thus can never ice another bro or be iced.

Rule #2: If you are iced by a fellow bro you can ice block. When presented w/ an ice, you pull out an ice of your own and reverse the ice on your bro. The ultimate ice insult.

I heard about this game from my friends Milo and Stina on a Sunday and by Thursday of that week I had purchased a twelve pack of Ices and was ready to play. Unfortunately for me, that night I had gone grocery shopping with my roommate Danny and while I parked the car, he strategically hid one of the Ices I had purchased in the cupboard where I would later be putting the groceries away. Within moments of walking into the kitchen, I walked right into the trap. I approached the cupboard to put away some canned beans and discovered  a cold Ice amongst our dry goods. Touche French.

Hilarity ensued as my friends and I ICED one another over the coming days…Here’s a quick look at some of my favorites…

Danny, is that an Ice hidden behind your toothbrush? Mmm…hope that icey goodness went well with your minty fresh Colgate at 5:30am.

Mary, I just painted my nails and they’re still wet. Can you grab your surprise out of my pocket?

Kevin caught my trying to ice him and ended up icing me. He twisted off the cap, tipped my head back and made me chug it right there at the bar. (Mind you we had not purchased the ice in the bar.) This is Kev finishing it off for me before we got caught.

Blaire: Denise, Can I hold one of the ices in my purse for you?
Denise: Blaire, That’s so kind. (It was until I opened the bag and on it was a sticky note from Greg reading, “You’ve been iced.”)

At the Brrr-Fest Gardens

While Blaire is holding two full beers, she turns to Greg and says, “I think I’m getting burned, can you reach into my purse and grab my sunscreen.” Blaire, however doesn’t see that Greg also has two full beers and Caroline, who we had just met that morning, kindly offers to get it for her. Caroline got iced. Welcome to the group Caroline. (Simultaneously Taz was Iced too!)

By 9pm we were all back at the house to cuddle up and watch The Hangover. Danny decided to take a quick cat nap, only to wake up with an Ice in his back pocket. No time for naps Danny.

PS I heart Union Street Festival!

We’ve Lost Doug…Again

I’m still unclear why, but Mary’s younger brother Doug has moved to San Francisco for the amazing summer ahead! For those of you who know Mary, imagine a male version of her and you have Doug. So on Friday night we wanted to welcome him to the city, so we hosted an average weekend night on the town. Dinner at my place. Cocktails in North Beach. Late night pizza. Dance party. In addition to Doug, my friends Cait and Ali were also in town…a full house, so to speak.

We cheated a little on dinner and heated up a frozen lasagna and spent more energy on the delicious cocktails. Before we knew it hours had passed, it was 11:30pm and we were catching cabs for the bars. We headed to Savoy in North Beach…I’m not entirely sure what went down. Things were blurry after the first drink. I vaguely remember talking to a couple guys, friends, etc. I’m pretty sure Mary, Doug and I hit up Golden Boy pizza and somehow we made it back to my apartment with a crowd for an after party. I didn’t last long…I was found in Sean’s bed passed out, face down, jeggings and all.

The next morning I woke up next to Mary in bed. I roll over and she clamours, “Where’s Doug?!”

SIDE NOTE: In any other situation this would not be a legitimate question or concern. However, a couple months back Doug was visiting for the weekend and Mary had taken him out to dinner and drinks. I ran into them at KTs (RIP) around midnight that evening and neither of them could form complete sentences. That next morning we discovered Doug had been picked up by the police and dropped off at his oldest sister’s house in Russian Hill. His wallet and cell phone were gone and his hands were cut and bleeding. Mary was responsible for him that night and had to work up quite the story to keep from getting her ass chewed out by her family.

So on Saturday morning when we awoke to prep for Beer & Oyster Festival brunch and activities, questioning Doug’s location was a valid question. I convinced Mary he just wasn’t awake yet and she just needed to give him some time. By 11am we were dressed and still no Doug. We went to his apartment, bribed the door man and pounded on his front door. Still no Doug. I called the police to see if he was in the drunk tank, while Mary worked on getting a spare key to his place. Low and behold, Doug was sounds asleep, phone off, at his side.

Now that Doug was located we headed over to Kel’s for Beer & Oyster Brunch. Yummy deliciousness ensued. (Note the boy in the blue shirt. That’s Kellan’s brother Patrick. He comes for this weekend every year. He’s an excellent time.)

By 2pm we were into the Festival, enjoying the music and desperately searching for the margaritas tent. Bingo! Danny not only found the bar, but also the heaviest handed bartender!

SIDE NOTE: At last year’s Beer & Oyster, Danny and I didn’t make it past 3pm. Around 2:30 I was asked to leave the festival after attempting to order a margarita from the bartender who was passing out free shots of tequila. On our way home I discovered a bench to rest on. After looking at the below picture, it’s no wonder I was asked to leave.

This year, I made it the whole day…

It definitely got a little cold, but we waited it out to hear the first couple Cake songs. At this point the wind was chilly, but we were toasty…for example:

Milo challenged a five year old hippie child to a hula hoop contest. Milo was beat in less than one minute.

The annual pyramid came and went quite quickly…

We determined “Blueblockers” make you feel ten times more drunk than you already are… (To purchase your own pair, click here.)

We headed to Paxti’s for some pizza goodness post festival. On our way there we ran into a park, some slutty women Danny and Doug stalked for a bit and met new friends…

At Paxti’s we managed to make quite the scene. Someone ordered three 12-packs of PBR, which the group then proceeded to shotgun on the street. We tend to keep it classy wherever we go. (Please note Kellan has morphed to Bel at this point in the day. I’m sure she blames her brother’s terrible influence.)

I’d say only a couple ounces of dignity were lost at this year’s Beer & Oyster Festival. Looking forward to Union Street and North Beach Festival in June!!

PS Check out this judging baby. This little biatch stared me down for a solid five minutes. Seriously?!

Your Personal Guide to San Francisco’s Festival Season

That’s right…it’s quickly approaching…Festival Season…My favorite time of year, beginning with International Beer Festival, extending through Oktoberfest. (Apologies in advance to my friends and family who will have to deal with my weekend shenanigans from now through October.)

To help you best plan when and how you will celebrate you’re amazing life over the coming months, here’s a one stop shop for the best of the best festivals and events! I will do my best (even in my drunken stupor) to keep the information up to date…Note: These will also be listed on the site’s side bar, under “My San Francisco” calendar. Enjoy!

Only in San Francisco: A great site for all your San Francisco good times!

April

Monday, April 5
A’s Home Opener Game

Friday, April 9
Giants Home Opener Game

Saturday, April 10
SCU Day at the Giants

Sunday, April 18
A Taste of Tamales by the Bay

Thursday, April 22
Aloha Charity Happy Hour (5:30 – 8:30) at  Aventine

Saturday, April 24
San Francisco International Beerfest

Sunday, April 25
2010 Opening Day on the Bay

May

Wednesday, May 5
Cinco de Mayo

Saturday, May 15 & Sunday, May 16
O’Reily’s Beer & Oyster Festival

Sunday, May 16
Bay to Breakers

Saturday, May 22
Uncorked Wine Festival

Friday, May 28
Sex & The City II Premiere

June

Saturday, June 5 & Sunday, June 6, 10am-6pm
Union Street Festival

Sunday, June 13
Haight Street Faire

Saturday, June 19 & Sunday, June 20, 10am-6pm
North Beach Festival

Sunday, June 27
Pinot Days

Saturday, June 26 & Sunday, June 27
San Francisco Pride

July

Saturday, July 3
Independence Day
Fireworks on the Bay

Saturday, July 3 & Sunday, July 4
Fillmore Jazz Festival

August

TBD
Outside Lands Music & Arts Festival

September

Friday, September 3 – Monday, September 6
Sausalito Art & Wine Festival

Saturday, September 11 & Sunday, September 12
Ghiradelli Square Chocolate Festival

Saturday, September 25 & Sunday, September 26
SF International Dragon Boat Festival

Sunday, September 26
Folsom Street Faire

October

Sunday, October 3
Castro Street Fair

Friday, October 8 – Tuesday, October 12
Fleet Week

Saturday, October 23 – Tuesday, October 26
Oktoberfest by the Bay